So I took the Fleabag to the vet the other day. After an alarmingly violent fight trying to get the little scrapper into her carry box we left the house to catch the bus. She doesn’t like traffic much as each time a car passed on the busy main road she’d squash herself into the back of the cat box so when the bus pulled up I’m not sure what she must have been thinking as I stepped into the mouth of the beast she was so scared of.

The motion of the bus seemed to calm her down but when we reached the vet she shot out the box. I don’t know why she thought it would be safer in the vets surgery.

Anyway the vet checked her out and gave her a couple of booster shots and told me that she was overweight. I didn’t really need a vet to tell me that thanks. What I did want to know was what the strange rash under her chin was. I had horrible fears of the beginnings cat skin cancer or a symptom of some other life threatening disease. What would I do if she had to get an operation? I have no pet insurance and no money to pay for medication. What if an operation wouldn’t even work and I had to say goodbye? I don’t think I could handle losing my little friend. Clearly these were extremely irrational fears but they had crossed my mind all the same.

‘She’s got acne,’ the vet said.

‘Acne?’ I replied.

‘Yeah, just give her chin a wipe with a wet cloth to clear away the dead skin and it should clear up fine.’

So I paid the vet fifty quid to tell me my cat is overweight and has acne. Brilliant.